Monday, December 27, 2004

Christmas Aftermath

I decided it is time I "make time" for my blog. It is the Christmas season and when people click on my blog they see PMS in giant letters, and makes them feel all warm and cozy inside. So anyway onto bigger and better things.
Christmas has come and gone for yet another year and we are left in the aftermath! This was our first Christmas in Hawaii and it was great. We had Santa in the morning and the warm sunny beach in the afternoon. Only I had to keep reminding myself throughout the day that it was actually Christmas because it sure did not feel like Christmas. No Christmas I have ever experienced anyway.
So after we sat in the aftermath of Christmas morning I had to sit back and think to myself that my children just might be spoiled rotten and that it just might be my own doing, and that I just might not be doing them any favors by giving them everything they want. They did the whole unwrap, toss to the side, and say next routine during the whole unwrapping process. Then when the final present was unwrapped my daughter has the audacity to say "is that it?" Is that it? Yes that is it, were the 20 plus presents you just unwrapped not enough? In the last few months I have been trying to teach my daughter to appreciate what she has. So if she gets a treat after school she should appreciate it and not ask for more or expect it every day. So if I give her a red candy she does not ask for the blue one but appreciate that she got one at all. Apparently this lesson did not sink in when she asked for more more more on Christmas morning. I have to say though that the apple is not falling too far from the tree on this one. I am always finding myself say more more more as well. So I guess before I start to work on my daughter I should probably start at the base of the problem which would be me. I know that we are not supposed to store our treasures on earth but in Heaven, but I kind of had the theory that I would store them on earth and then shack up with one of my rich "Godly" friends in heaven. I'm sure I could get a wing in one of their mansions right? I have even passed the thought that there is no pain or jealousy or bad feelings in heaven so who cares if I have a shack in heaven and my neighbor has a mansion. Kind of like my I don't care if I live in a card board box in Hawaii b/c at least I get to live in Hawaii. Although that is not all together true b/c we have a four bedroom house in Hawaii and I still complain that it is not big enough and too old. I am sure that there has to be some warning written in real tiny letters that I am missing here and they will be revealed in magnitude one day. It is not like I go out and try to be materialistic, it just comes naturally. So maybe it is time that I learn be happy with what I got and stop looking for more. To appreciate the many blessing I have been given and be greatful for them, so that I can be a positive influence in my kids life. I have a feeling this is going to be one of those lessons that takes me a long time to learn, and I will eventually learn it the hard way. What do they say in alcoholics anonymous.....The first step is admitting there is a problem?

Friday, December 17, 2004


That acronym has my name written all over it. Once a month a become a pot about to boil over, a kettle about to blow it's lid, a lioness roaring in the deepest jungle, I am a bear about to attack, I am a bundle of elastics all knotted togeather, and that it when I am trying to hold a leash on my busting bundle of hormones! It is a time when my husband knows to stay at least a good 5 feet away from me, but would probably prefer an entire country to stand between us. My household has come to learn that the best thing to do is avoid me at all cost. This "mood" as you might call it lasts for 3 days minimum, but can extend for up to a week. My brother came to visit this summer and he stayed for two months. We did not fight the whole time he was here except for one time and I bet you can guess what week that was! He got online with my husband at which time Ben gave him some wonderful advice. RUN! RUN FAST AND DO NOT LOOK BACK! I am not capable of being sweet on these days. All I can say is the grocery store lady is darn lucky she did not run into me today! She may not have lived to talk about it. So I would write more but even blogging is irritating me today! AARRRGGGHHHH!
screaming makes me feel better:)

Just a little side note to my fellow bloggers: for the next two weeks my blogs will be few and far between. My dad is coming to visit and we have an itinerary that is jam packed! So don't leave me comments asking me where my blog is. Yes it is okay for me to harass you about your blog, but it is not a two way street. Can you detect the bad hormones seeping into my writing? Yuck! I really should just tie myself up in one of those pretty white jackets with the buckle in the back until I learn how to be nice again.

So to all my fellow bloggers, know that I do love you all and that my evil personality has taken over for the next few days. I hope you all have a great Christmas Holiday and I will blog when I can!

Thursday, December 16, 2004

Christmas cheer is in the air!

I just love Christmas! The music, the food, the presents, the decorations, and best of all the cheerful people! At least that is what I expect from people, to be cheerful during the time of year that we celebrate Jesus's birth! This is not what I ran into yesterday how ever. No yesterday I felt like I was wearing a shirt with a bulls eye on it because everyone was out to get me. My day started out just fine, I was going about my everyday buisness, doing what I do, hum dee dum dee dum. Well I had invited our neighbors over for dinner because they are getting ready to move to England, and I was getting ready to start supper when I realized I was missing a few ingredients. So I take a quick solo run to the grocery store to get some last minute goodies. I am unloading my cart onto the runway belt thing-a-majig when apparently my cart brushed the little girl of the person in front of me, and this is how the rest of the conversation went:
she spins around with a devilish look in her eyes and says"You just hit my daughter with your cart"
I innocently respond "Oh gosh I am so sorry I did not mean to!"
she retorts with a "Well you just ran right into her" in a not so quite voice.
I starting to get irritated myself say "I am so sorry it was a total accident I did not mean to and you really do not need to be talking to me that way. Can you please speak a little nicer"
she spat "Don't tell me how to talk, who do you think you are?
I give her my biggest sweetest smile and say "God bless you and your family mame!"
she retorts "yeah you to you little B_ _ _ H! I am sure you can fill in those blanks.
I, in total shock at this point say "Mame those are some real good values you are impressing on your two young children."
she says "Don't you tell me how to raise my touch me with that cart one more time and I am going to MESS YOU UP!"
I stop the conversation right there and put my hands up in the air. I am at a loss for words. Yeah I know what you are thinking, me, Alyssa Turner at a loss for words??? Well of course I go home shaking in my boots (well my flip flops) because it made my blood boil that someone could be that rude, and I started to think of all the things I should have said.
Like "excuse me! Excuse me! Are you threatening me? Are you threatening me in front of all these witnesses? Do you mind if I dial up the police and you can repeat that for me?"
or no wait I could have knelt down to her two small children and said "I am sorry your mommy is acting this way...Does she always threaten to beat people up at the grocery store?"
But I did none of these thing. I just turned the other cheek and let her think she won.
Matthew 5:39 ringing in my ears "But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also."

So I get to the house and preheat my oven and begin preparing dinner when I notice a strange smell and lots of smoke coming from the oven. I open it to find the taco shells left over from last nights dinner still sitting on a cookie sheet. Only they no longer looked like taco shells, they were more like a couple of hot coals melted right into the pan. So I expose of the little burnt offerings out the front door and open a few windows to air out the house. I know what the Neighbors were thinking....Oh no Alyssa is cooking again. It did not help that my two young daughters were running out from door screaming FIRE! FIRE!

So I get the house smelling back to normal thanks to some great smelling candles. We ate dinner and then we went to an outdoor concert on base that they throw every year during Christmas. We went with our friends that have two girls the same age as mine and the kids were having a blast playing, dancing, and trying to sing, when the guy behind me taps me on the shoulder and says "could you calm your kids down we are trying to watch the concert and our kids are sleeping!" Wow the nerve of some people! Maybe you should take them home!!

I got home and asked my husband if I had a sign that said "I love confrontations" on my back. What a day. People are strange!

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

We should talk more often.....

Let me start by saying "my back is killing me!" I don't think I was made for all this house cleaning stuff. I stayed away from my computer today, and I have to say I really accomplished allot! I even got to that horrid ring around my toilet bowl! Today I have scrubbed and scoured and cleaned,and my house is almost looking presentable for company. So as I was elbow deep in toilet water I started thinking about marriage and the importance of communication. As I am sure you know communication is very important in a marriage, and I have it down pat. I definitely get an A plus in communication. Here are some exapmles:

1) When Ben says "Are you going to eat all those fries?"
I say "Oh! So now you think I am a fat cow?" " I am just never going to be good
enough for you am I?"

2) When Ben says "Can you please pass the gravy?"
I return with a "Now I am expected to wait on you hand and foot?" "Shall I bow and call you
king as well?"

3) when Ben says "I've been thinking...."
I of course say "Oh NO! Not again!"

4)when Ben says "How about a little hanky panky tonight"
I say "What again? Are you telling me last month was not enough for you?" "You can only
put the human body through so much!"

5)when Ben says"I love you!"
I say "what do you want????"

6)when Ben says "I like your outfit"
I say "you hate it don't you?!"

7)when Ben says "You look beautiful"
I say "yes I know....I have a big zit on my forehead...Thanks allot for pointing it out!"

8)when Ben says "Did you spend any money at the Gap today?"
I without a flinch say "ummm of course not honey!"

9)when Ben says "the house looks really clean."
I say "well no thanks to you!"

It also works the other way around. Like if I want him to help with dishes after dinner I simply say "Honey would you mind please helping me with the dishes? Well except it sounds a little more like "I guess I am doing the dishes all by my freaking self again!!!" He responds really well to sarcasm. I think I learnt this about men in premarital counseling or something. Then of course when he says "do you need more blankets sweetheart?" I say "no thanks I love pretending I am an Eskimo!" Now that I think about it I should probably publish a book on communicating in a marriage. I bet allot of people would appreciate this kind of help. I can be the "how to marriage girl!" I mean I am practically the proverbs 31 women. A little ruff around the edges maybe but no one is perfect right?

Oh also tonight I bought Ben's Christmas present at the store...Well one of them. Then I came home hid it and lasted ten whole minutes before I gave it to him. Only ten more days till Christmas so it is really not that big a deal. I mean it s practically Christmas day. Ten minutes is a long time to have to keep a secret.

I Corinthians 13-A Christmas Version

If I decorate my house perfectly with plaid bows, strands of twinkling lights and shiny balls,
but do not show love to my family, I'm just another decorator.
If I slave away in the kitchen, baking dozens of Christmas cookies, preparing gourmet meals and arranging a beautifully adorned table at mealtime, but do not show love to my family, I'm just another cook.
If I work at the soup kitchen, carol in the nursing home and give all that I have to charity, but do not show love to my family, it profits me nothing.
If I trim the spruce with shimmering angels and crocheted snowflakes, attend a myriad of holiday parties and sing in the choir's cantata but do not focus on Christ, I have missed the point.
Love stops the cooking to hug the child.
Love sets aside the decorating to kiss the husband.
Love is kind, though harried and tired.
Love doesn't envy another's home that has coordinated Christmas china and table linens.
Love doesn't yell at the kids to get out of the way, but is thankful they are there to be in the way.
Love doesn't give only to those who are able to give in return but rejoices in giving to those who can't.
Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails.
Video games will break, pearl necklaces will be lost, golf clubs will rust, but giving the gift of love will endure.
Merry Christmas and lots of love to you and yours!

I did not feel like thinking today so I thought I would post an email that I have recently recieved! Love and holiday cheer to all!

Monday, December 13, 2004

12 days till Christmas!!

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, dirty laundry in a basket!

On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me, two headaches before noon, and dirty laundry in a basket!

On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me, three kids a whining, two headaches before noon, and dirty laundry in a basket!

On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, 4 more broken Christmas ornaments, three kids a whining, two headaches before noon, and dirty laundry in a basket!

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me

5 ooooooovvvveeerrr due billls to paaaayyy!

4 more broken ornaments, three kids a whining, two headaches before noon, and dirty laundry in a basket.

On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me 6 more guests to dinner, 5 oooooovvvveeeerrr due billllls to paaaaayy, 4 more broken ornaments, three kids a whining, two headaches before noon, and dirty laundry in a basket!

On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me, 7 miles to run on the treadmill because he said my butts to big for those pants, 6 more guests to dinner, 5 oooovvvveeerrr due billllls to paaaayyy! 4 more broken instruments, three kids a whining, 2 headaches before noon, and dirty laundry in a basket!

On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me 8 more stacks of dishes to wash, 7 miles on the treadmill to run because he said my butt is to big for those pants, 6 more guests to dinner, 5 OOOVVVVVEEERRR due billlllllls to Paaaayyyyy! 4 more broken ornaments, three kids a whining, 2 headaches before noon, and dirty laundry in a basket.

On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, 9 stinky diapers to change, 8 more stacks of dishes to wash, 7 miles to run on the treadmill because he said my butt looks too big in those pants, 6 more guest to dinner, 5 OOOOVVVVEEERRR due billlllsss to Paaaaaaayyyy! 4 more broken ornaments, 3 kids a whining, two headaches before noon, and dirty laundry in a basket!

On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, 10 more gifts to wrap, 9 stinky diapers to change, 8 more stacks of dishes to wash, 7 miles to run on the treadmill because he told me my butt is too big in those pants, 6 more guests to dinner, 5 OOOVVVVEEEERRR due billllllls to paaaayyyy! 4 more broken ornaments, 3 kids a whining, two headaches before noon, and dirty laundry in a basket!

On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me 11 "to do" lists that must get done, 10 more gifts to wrap, 9 stinky diapers to change, 8 more stacks of dishes to wash, 7 miles to run on the treadmill because he said my butt looks too big in those pants, 6 more guests to dinner, 5 OOOVVVVEEEEERRR due billllls to paaaaayyyy! 4 more broken ornaments, three kids a whining, two headaches before noon, and dirty laundry in a basket!

On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, 12 reasons to have a melt down, 11 "to do" lists that must get done, 10 more gifts to wrap, 9 stinky diapers to change, 8 more stacks of dishes to wash, 7 miles to run on the treadmill because he said my butt looks too big in those pants, 6 more guests to dinner, 5 OOOVVVVEEEERRRR due billllls to paaaayyyyy! 4 more broken ornaments, three kids a whining, 2 headaches before noon, and dirty laundry in a basket!

Some times we get caught up in all the hussle and bussle of Christmas. I pray that we all take time to reflect on the true reason for the season, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. May you all have a blessed Christmas! Only twelve more days left and we will once again take down the tree , pack all the decorations back into a box, and try to loose the 10 extra pounds we gained!

Saturday, December 11, 2004

Alyssa's Random Thoughts.....

Let me start by saying the pressure is on! Flipping through blog world I have noticed that almost every blog has a general theme. Some people have photo blogs to show off their artistic flair, some people have religious blogs, where they can preach the good new of Jesus Christ, some people have political blogs where they can Bush bash and complain about Americans and America, ( I do not read those ones....Mostly because I do not understand what they are saying) , some have wonderful little life lessons, ect. So I said to my self..."self I said" and I do this often. Talk to myself....And then answer myself. What is the general theme behind my blog? I sometimes show pictures but it is never anything of artistic value, I sometimes talk about God but it is just one baby Christian's opinion. I certainly do not talk politics, I still have to ask my husband "which ones are we again? Democrat or republican??" I certainly don't have any life lessons and my thoughts do not run much deeper then do you prefer to sit or stand after doing your buisness? So I have come to the conclusion from reading peoples comments that I am the "funny blog". I don't know how this happened because I have never been a really funny person. I was never been voted class clown, I never told a joke and had someone spit milk out their nose, I'm just your average run of the mill mother and housewife. So now you see the pressure is on. My "people" think I am funny and now I feel like everyday I have to out do my blog from the day before. This is allot of pressure for me. What if one day I run out of funny things to say? What if I have to surcome to "knock knock" and "a white horse fell in the mud jokes?" What if people start throwing rotten tomatoes at me as they laugh and point and say there is the girl who pretended to be funny but in the end was just plane punny? I could just post a picture of myself and at least give you something funny to look at! I am going to have to start watching comedians and stealing their one liners, and then I will get sued for plagiarism, and I will not be able to pay the huge settlement, and I will be thrown in jail, and my kids will go to foster care, and they will never speak to me again, and, and,and.........BREATH.......ok I'm alright. You see the standards I have to live up to?

So that being said let me tell you about my night last night. My friend called out of the blue and asked if the girls wanted to sleep over. This being the mom of the little girl who stayed at our house the previous weekend. So I got all the girls packed up and was ready to send them on their merry way! I was thinking about all the things I was going to be able to do that night now that I was down to only one child. Then I thought you know what that might be quite boring seeing as my list consisted of laundry, mopping, and dishes. So me being the lame and not at all pushy person that I am called her and asked if I can come over to play to. They were going to be making gingerbread houses, watching movies, and all sorts of fun stuff that was starting to sound way better then dishes and mopping. So off we all went (Ben was of course working) for a night of pre-Christmas fun! So we ate dinner (which I invited myself to) we made houses, (mine was the best, and Heather's kept caving in!), we drank wine, we ate candy, we laughed, we cried......ok we didn't cry but they always say that in the movies. So anyway we were well into the evening when the kids come marching down the stairs chanting " Heather is the best sleepover parent ever! Ballie's mommy is the best!" Apparently she had read my blog about our little sleep over party and my strive to get an A in sleepover 101. So the competition was on! She was pulling rabbits out of her hat left and right. "guess what kids! For breakfast I will make you pancakes and hot chocolate!" I did not have a fighting chance. We had all the kids in jammies and watching a movie upstairs, when down stairs Heather and I were having a slumber party of our own! We had wine, and candy, and wine, and girl talk, and next thing you know it is 1am the kids are asleep, her husband was asleep, and we were giggling like a couple of school girls. The girls have since informed us that their sleepover did not count because I was there most of the time. What can I say your mother is a tag along. I agree that it was not a fair sleepover b/c all the kids were asleep by 11pm.....Not 1am like the week before! So as we are competing for "the best sleep over parent ever" I decided that maybe this is one trophy I should let her win. If she is the best sleepover parent ever then all the sleepovers will be at her house. So I am throwing the game and she can have her victory....But I am the true winner here. Hee Hee!

On to my next subject. Don't you hate when certain people get jealous of what a wonderful blogger you are that they go out of their way to point out what ever flaw they can possibly find just to boost their own ego? A certain someone who I will not mention (her name is Kelly Trimle, she lives in Wichita Falls, TX, she has a husband named Jeff and two really cute little boys!) but I am not one to throw names so as I was saying. This certain person had the audacity to write a blog about a pet peeve of hers. She has a pet peeve of people who have bad grammar and cannot spell. Sounds fine enough...Everyone has their quirks...UNTIL my name was listed two times throughout her blog. This coming from a person who is so busy searching for my spelling errors that her kids are left to entertain themselves and run on her roof top for fun! Just kidding Kelly, LOVE YOU! Just remember you started it. Well sort of, well maybe, well I don't remember who started it but mark one on the score board for me! BOOYAA!

Thursday, December 09, 2004

Who let the blogs out?

For the first time all day the house is quit. I love bed time, it is my favorite time of day. When the kids are sleeping, Ben is busy at work making me lots of money and I get to sit down for some one on one time with my computer. What am I saying......I have one on one time with my computer most of the day. Well now I have QUITE one on one time with my computer. So I read in a friends blog, that he read in some article or something, that blog is becoming one of the most common household names. I believe that! Never in my wildest imagination did I ever think that I would be obsessed with such a stupid word. I mean blog? What does it even stand for? I wrote it out and tried to brainstorm but nothing sounded good. All I could come up with was baby loves orange games, and that if it was a phone number it would be 2564 but that makes no sense. So I am giving up and going on with the rest of my blog. So anyway I have lost count of the number of times and ways that the world blog goes through my head in a given day. write a blog, read a blog, I am going to go blogging, I love to blog, did you read that other bloggers blog, how many bloggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? See what I mean. I am starting to get sick of that word, yet I cannot stop thinking about it or saying it. Now when I yell at my kids I say you better get your blogging butt down here in 5 blogging minutes or I am going to spank the blog out of you! I say to my hubby I love you so bloggen much. You scared the blog out of! Its out of control. Now I even have the song "Might as well face it....I'm addicted to blog!" going through my head. I don't know what to do. Will this blogging sickness pass. Will it be like puberty and I will just have to grow out of it...or into it? Will I stop writing blogs in my sleep. Today every thought I had through out the day I was re-writing into a blog. I am having a shower and in my head I am blogging "don't you just hate when your shaving your legs and.........." then I am changing a dirty diaper and my blog continues "diapers are a very stinky subject in my house...." and I just blog along through the day. blog blog blog! What will my grave stone say when I die? "she came! she saw! she blogged?" I just put blog into the google search and did you know there is a blog directory called blogarama where you can have you blog listed. that is just blogragous. What next a young girl will meet a young guy at a bar and say, "hey I'll show you my blog if you show me yours? " You know the old saying "two blogs are better then one" I bet there is even a dog out there who has recently been named blog. He is blog the dog, or the blog dog. bloggy doggy. Now I am just being silly. Well it is getting late and this little blogger is going to bed! So I bid you a good-blogging night. Blog you later! Catch you on the blog side! See you later awhile blogadial. OK thats about blogenough already!
p.s.-this spell check should be very interesting!
p.s.s.- ok this is so pathetic. I originally titled this blog "Blog Much?" shut my computer down for the night , swept the left overs from a bag of chips that Corben had dumped on the floor before he went to bed, and was heading up the stairs to my own bed when I thought of the new ,better, and existing titel to this blog. So I came back downstairs, re-started the computer and edited this blog. Then actually got excited because I could add a "p.s.s." I am one dedicated blogger! Goodnight! (for real this time!)

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

Read at your own risk!

So my blog went over so well last night I got to thinking (yes it hurt) that maybe I should write a blog about 50 things you may or may not know about me but wished you didn't. Then I could not think of that many and decided to scratch it, but here are a few. Sometimes I am in such a rush to get out the door that I skip a few steps of my regiment. To find out later down the road that there is a weird smell when I lift up my arms. Thank goodness for baby wipes because I just rub a couple under my arms and VOILA spring fresh! I have come to the decision that maybe this is a step I should not skip. Next ...I sometimes tell my husband that my period lasts longer then it really does so I do not get caroused into having sex when I am just plane to tired and would rather sleep. I once accidentally walked into the bathroom after my husband had finished doing his buisness and the site I saw still haunts me. You see what I do standing up for number one he does for number two. It was not pretty. He is going to kill me, and I don't blame him. Our toilet in our bathroom (mine and Ben's) has a serious ring around the toilet. I tend to ignore it because no one ever sees is but us. Two out of three clean toilets should be good enough. That is over 50%. Occasionally after clipping and cleaning my toe nails I will take a quick wiff of the hidden treasures in hopes that one day they just might smell like roses. Ok that's enough for now. Oh don't sit there with your nose in the air....And pretend you do not do it to.
Oh no I just had a bad thought. I recall in a telephone conversation with my dad that he sometimes reads my blogs. This could be a little too much information if you know what I mean. Well I guess if he read the title and continued to read it is his fault for what he sees and yours to! I think I may have just crossed the blogging line.

So after conjuring up these not so pretty images in your head I will change the subject.

Corben has been consistent in breaking at least one ornament a day since Thanksgiving. He takes his work seriously. Today he broke three! But today I also broke one. You see I was busy doing dishes like every good housewife should and when I was done I cleaned out the sink and turned the garbage disposal on. Well apparently without my knowledge Corben had thrown a Christmas ornament down the garbage disposal. I did not know that a garbage disposal could make that kind of sound. How did an 18 month old get a Christmas ornament into the garbage disposal? Where there is a will there is a way. Maybe if all my attention was not focused on my 17 inch best friend I would have noticed. At least he was not out playing on the roof.....Right Kelly!

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

50 things you may or may not know about me!

1. my middle name is Dawn. Originally my mom wanted dawn to be my first name and Alyssa to be my middle but then it would be Dawn Alyssa and that sounds very similar to Mona Lisa. By the way my name is spelled alisa but pronounce a-lisa.

2. I have the three cutest kids on the face of the planet. (at least in my eyes)

3. I have been a Christian for 6 years, but am not growing in God's love as fast and as much as I would like to be. By no other fault but my own.

4. I have been married to my husband for 6 years in a couple weeks, but I am not always the loving wife he deserves.

5. My big toe on my right foot is now half off do to the corben and ravioli can incident. So every toe is painted but that one and it looks real silly.

6. My favorite color is pink, could I get any girlier? Is that a word?

7. the palms of my hands are very ticklish.

8. my motto in life is you can never have enough clothes, and I live by it well!

9. I have no rhythm when I dance but I really wish I did. Unfortunately I handed this down to my oldest daughter Addison.

10. I am very clumsy and hardly get through a meal without spilling on my shirt. Good thing I have lots of backups. I am not walk into walls clumsy but I am always dropping stuff.

11. I copied this idea from someone else's blog. Someone I do not even know.

12. see I can't keep a secret.

13. I do not like the feel of wearing a thong and do not understand how anyone could.

14. After I tinkle I wipe standing up...but sit down for number 2.

15. I always thought the good thing about having small boobs is that at least they won't be able to sag when I get older...well guess what.....I was sadly mistaken.

16. I have a serious crush on Ben Affleck and would seriously consider running off with him. Although his turn offs are he smokes and he voted for Kerry.

17. I love to decorate the house, but like my blogs, I steal ideas from everyone else and never have any good ones of my own.

18. One of my favorite shows on TV is One Tree Hill, and yes they are in highschool.

19. I always wanted to be a cheerleader but never was and am now living vicariously through my daughter, who is 5. Sad isn't it?

20. When I was pregnant with my son I secretly wanted another girl, but I am sooooo glad God had a different plan. The bond between a mother and a son is so incredible.

21. My biggest pet peeve is when your pants wrinkle in the hip area and bag out in knees after you sit down.

22. I often fall asleep in the bath tub.

23. When I grow up I want to be as witty, and have a blog like Darlene from "What Would Jesus Blog" I have never even met her but somehow feel like I know her. Hopefully one day I will meet the real thing.

24. I got my first zit when I was 19 and have not stopped since.

25. I have 7 more months in my 20's

26. My husband is really hoping I hit my sexual peek when I turn 30.

27. About two year ago I had a serious sweaty armpit problem and would soak through the pits of all my clothes, then one day it just stopped. A mystery to me!

28. the tops of my inner thigh rub together when I walk.

29. In college my roommate and I would get drunk and watch Aladen. More then once...more then ten times.

30. only 20 more left bare with me

31. the best movie I have seen lately is Bridget Jones's Diary prt 2

32. I spent many years shaking my fist at God over "why" questions, but have since come to accept that we are just not going to have all the answers on this side of glory.

33. I sometimes wear the days of the week underwear on the wrong days. What ever is closest to the top. Yes I bought them in the kids section, but in my defense they were on sale for 50 cents a pair, and I never pass up a good deal.

34. the hair color of my youth does not come to me naturally anymore. That you probably already knew from my two inches of roots.

35. when my daughter gets to 6th grade she will probably be smarter then I am, and that's being nice.

36. I never ever watch the news because I am just simply not interested.

37. Instead I watch good quality television like MTV.

38. I am in love with the show Desperate Housewives, and schedule my Sunday nights around it.

39. I have been searching for a church to call home since we moved to Hawaii almost a year ago and am getting discouraged and close to giving up.

40. I brought both my brothers to Christ this summer. It was amazing!

41. I have not had a quite time in several month but am trying to convince myself that Darlene's blog counts.

42. I have a bad habit of picking dry skin off my lips.

43. I put ketchup on almost everything I eat, and my favorite food is french fries. (got a two for one there)

44. I have not worked in my scrapbooks for 2 years. I told myself I was not going to be one of those moms that has tons of pictures in an awesome scrapbook for my first kid and then not keep it up for the rest of them. You already know the outcome to this one.

45. I hate morning time, and become wide awake when the sun goes down.

46. I pretend that I keep a wonderfully clean house but mostly only clean it if I know someone is coming over. Although I have a new neighbor who is queen of the unannounced "drop in" so my house stays allot cleaner these days. I don't know if I should thank her or kill her. Kill is a very harsh word but I could not think of another one. so no that I wanted a kinder word but I have writers block.

47. I have heard so many of my friends experience guilt over leaving their kids to go out with friends or a trip or what ever the case may be. I do not feel at all guilty about taking time for myself. Is that a good thing or am I just a bad mom?

48. I love the smell of coffee but cannot stand the taste of it.

49. I tried drugs in college.

50. I think it is funny when I fart out loud, but give my husband heck if he does it.

I could go on but I will spare you. I bet you are thinking "why could she not have followed in the shoes of David Letterman and did a top ten."

Monday, December 06, 2004


Everyone already knows that I am compulsive. A compulsive shopper that is but now I am also obsessive. Obsessed about what you ask? The computer! Between IM, email, and now blogging I am pretty much glued to this 17 inch screen. Our computer is in our living room so it is very easily accessible, maybe a little too accessible, and every time I here a ding or a dong I am running to it to see who is signing in and I pounce on them like a wild hungry cat. I am sure people have used the word stocker when referring to me. I am pretty sure people mark there sign to "away" just to avoid the girl with no life who sits on the computer all day. Sometimes I have 5 conversations going at once and it is a race against myself to keep up with all them. Sad that this is my most outstanding achievement these days. Now this whole Blog think is taking up all my days. I don't know how many times a day I am searching everyone's blogs for new posts. I am like a drug addict looking for her next fix. Thanks to all your awesome blogs my house is even messier then usual, my baby's diaper stays stinky a little longer, meal time has become anything that can be warmed in the microwave, and so on and so forth. My husband thinks that my cheeks have been crazy glued to my computer chair. Maybe if he peeled me off some of the excessive excessiveness would stay glue to the chair and I could cross pilates off the list of things I need to do each day. That would be nice. Anyway this new obsession is becoming a problem because I get absolutely nothing done every day. Today I was gabbing away to my brother when I realized it was 2pm and I had to go get Addison from school, and I was still in my pj's and so were both the kids. Good thing for the drop off zone.....I don't even need to get out of my car. A blessing for a lazy mom like me. Not brushing your hair is in these days right?

Sunday, December 05, 2004


Christmas is just so much better when you are not celebrating it in -20'C weather! Today we went to our favorite beach on the Island with our favorite friends on the Island and had a blast. We put on our Santa hats and got down to work making the perfect little snowman. Except in our version he was a sandman, and a cute little sandman at that. Where else but Hawaii can you build a sandman and then go catch a wave on your boogie board to cool off from all your hard work! I know I know I should probably stop bragging, good thing you cannot throw snowballs through the internet or I am sure I would have a few flying my way. I just never dreamed that I would have this wonderful opportunity to live in this beautiful place and I just thank God for every minute he gives us here on the Island. I still have to wake up and pinch myself that we actually get to live here. We are coming up on our one year anniversary here and I still say "can you believe WE LIVE in Hawaii???" Today was fun and we got some cool pics! Check them out below!

Surfs Up Santa!

Snowman Hawaiian Style

Saturday, December 04, 2004

Sleep deprivation

I have luggage, and unfortunately I do not mean Louie Vuitton! No the kind of luggage am speaking of is under my eyes.Last night we thought it might be fun to let our girls have a sleepover with their friend at out house. What was I thinking????It is one of those things where I feel like I have to totally impress this child because if for some reason she starts crying and decides she wants to go home to her mommy and daddy then I am a total failure. I would get an F in sleepover 101. So I pull out all the stops......I am baking cookies, I am serving sparkling grape juice in plastic wine glasses, I am setting up a tent, I am being funny, ect. My plan went down to perfection but I was one worn out and weary mommy. We put the girls to bed at 10pm. Well we attempted to anyway. The girls have bunkbeds so we put the two older girls together and Cam the youngest up in the top. Well this did not go over well at all with Camryn and there was no way all three girls would fit and sleep in the bottom bunk. So we being the best sleep over parents ever gave up our king size luxurious bed to these little 4 foot princesses. So this left everyone happy, except for me who was dreading that climb up the ladder to the top bunk, being pretty certain that the bed would not hold my weight and I would come crashing down on top of my unsuspecting husband who still attempts to tell me he doesn't think my butt is too big. Did I say this left them happy? I ment to say this left them happy for 5 minutes. We got them all bathed, brushed, tinkled, PJ'd up, and tucked in three times. Ben and I then came down to watch a movie in 10 minute intervals. Thump, thump, thump, thump, pause, I want a drink, thump, thump, thump, rewind, play, thump, thump, thump, pause, its too dark, thump, thump, thump, rewind, play, thump, thump, thump, pause, now it is too light, thump,thump,thump you get the drift. Thump, thump, thump, is the sound effects of the stairs (just in case you were wondering) this was followed by about ten, she pushed me, she said I wasn't her best friend, she already told a storey and now it is my turn to tell a storey and she is telling another one. So we finally finished our movie some where around 1am and I went up stairs to find the girls STILL awake and talking. I went in there to yell at them, I mean speak to them one more time and told them it was time to sleep and we were going to bed, when they all started crying and begging me to sleep with them. So in I crawl to my little 12 inches of space left for me in my king size not so luxurious bed. I spent the rest of the night attempting to sleep with two little knees jammed into my back and the soothing sound of grinding teeth. lets just say the next time I volunteer for a sleep over push me off a steep cliff and put me out of my misery. I am pretty sure I never acted this way when I was a little hormonal drama queen child. Right mom?
PS- the little darlings woke up and were raring to go again at 7am! that is 6 hours of sleep for any of you that are mathamatically challanged like me. I used a calculator!

Friday, December 03, 2004

I'll take one brain transplant please!

I have officially lost my mind. It has been threatening temporary insanity for some time now but now it is just simply non-existent. Yesterday my friend called and during conversation I asked her if she was going to our girl's cheerleading practice that night. She said she did not get the email and did not know about the practice, and that maybe that was a good thing b/c she would have a good excuse to not have to go. "not go!" I exclaim. "you have to go, who will I visit with on the side lines if you are not there?" So for the next five minutes I twisted her arm, she squealed in pain, and I convinced her to go. So the day goes on and I end up getting a last minute doctors appointment, so I asked my neighbor if she could watch the kids for an hour. She agreed and off I went. Funny how now I look forward to waiting in a DR's office waiting room because it is quite and no one is screaming "mmmmoooooomm!" Anyway back to my story. I get back from my appointment and go pick up the kids and of course we sit down and start gabbing. In conversation she finds out that Ben is working that night and she invites us to stay for supper. So we did and had a wonderful dinner and so forth. Well at 8:30 pm we were just cleaning up after the cookies and milk we made for the kids when she casually asks me "so what are you guys up to tomorrow" I respond with a "well tomorrow night the girls have a cheerleading performance OH MY GOSH!!!!" I forgot to go to cheerleading! I insisted that my friend go to cheerleading practice just to keep me company and I stood her up. It reminded me of all those nights I waited by the door for my flavor of the month I mean boyfriend of the month to come pick me up. So I called her up straight away to beg her for her forgiveness, and let her know that I will be scheduling a brain transplant at their earliest convenience. She being the loving person she is laughed it off, and I think she is still speaking to me. I mean she knows I am late for everything we talked about this the other day, but I think I have just taken that to new extremes.
On a totally different page, I have to say that my husband is the most romantic person in the world! He just came home and said I bought two gallons of milk for a very special reason.....They expire on our anniversary. Is that the most incredibly romantic gesture you have ever heard? A for effort I guess! Will someone please tell him that I prefer diamonds to milk.

Thursday, December 02, 2004

Bad time management!

Why is it that every single day I am the last mom racing to drop their kid off at school. That would be the best place for a cop to catch speeders, because I don't think I have ever done the speed limit on a school morning. Poor Addison is the last little trooper to enter the classroom on a daily basis. I think I am going for a world record in consecutive late days. If I were a cartoon character I would be the rabbit from Alice in Wonderland who is always late for an important date. The thing that bothers me is I was once, oh about 5 years ago back in my streach mark free days, was always right on time or early for everything. Lateness was a pet peeve of mine. Now I am the pet peeve. If I say meet you at 6 you can count on it being at least 7. Is it possible to be on time with three kids or am I just striving for something that does not exist. I am pretty sure Addison's teacher thinks I am a mindless ding dong, speaking of ding dong I could go for one right now.
This is the funniest thing. Right now I am sitting at the computer typing and my son is just now discovering that my husband put child locks on all the kitchen cupboards. You can just see the gears grinding in his mind. I'll give him one thing, he is persistent! HA! HA! My life just got ten times easier! Why did I wait so long to do this. This could be one of the greatest inventions ever. We never needed them with the girls, but boys are just so much more curious and destructive. Corben breaks something almost every day(including my toe). It is a good thing he is so darn cute and his smile melts my heart or he would be sold to the highest bidder on eBay.
Well he has been wondering the house for the last 15 minutes so I guess I should go do some damage control! Yikes he's got a wine glass, gotta go!

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

Can you keep a secret?

I cannot keep a secret to save my life! Well I can keep a real important secret, if someone tells me this absolutely cannot get it you have to keep this secret. It will still eat me up in side and I will want to tell someone.....Anyone. I have even had to tell a secret so bad that I would call a totally unknowing third party and tell them, because that's alright since they do not even know who I am talking about right? I love knowing a secret, but keeping a secret is almost impossible, especially when it is good news! I want to shout it from the roof tops! I am pretty sure that the bible would call this gossip....But in my head I have twisted it into something else, perhaps a prayer request. I can't even keep my own secrets! For example every year my husband and I take turns planning our anniversary and this year is my turn. Our anniversary is in December, but we are celebrating in Febuary this year due to child care arrangements. So while my husband was deployed all summer I thought that it would be the perfect time to plan it all out b/c I could hide all the evidence and have it all done before he returned home. I mean surely I can keep a secret from him if he is in a different country. So it was all finalized and paid for and all I had to do was keep my mouth shut until Febuary and reveal the big surprise. What did I do instead? Well everytime I talked to Ben I said " hey I just got our anniversary all planned out, do you want me to tell you what I am doing?" "How about a hint?" Ok so this went on for most of the summer, but him being better at this then I refused to let me tell him. So after awhile I kind of forget about it and think "hey I can do this" Well then my mother comes to visit and I had told her all about my plans, but I guess I forgot to tell her that it was a secret and that Ben does not know anything. Well casually over coffee when I was not in the room mom asks Ben what Island we are going to for our anniversary. Ben's ears perk up "ISLAND??"
Ok ok I can handle this, did a little damage control, told my mom it is ok because Ben already knew that we were out of airmiles and probably assumed we were going to another Island. So anyway a few weeks later we had friends visiting from Texas and we were all sitting around the breakfast table and our friends ask us "Are you guys going to be going to any other islands soon?" I reply "Oh yes we are going to Kauai in Febuary!" OPEN MOUTH INSERT FOOT! Ben was of course sitting right there and pretends he did not hear but we all know he did. So the cat was out of the bag, but I tried to defend myself by saying, "yeah well you do not know where we are staying on the island!" So there you have it folks, I have let out yet another secret. By the time we leave in Febuary I am sure he will know what hotel we are at, what color it is, the exact number of steps from the hotel to the beach, and any other information I have to divulge. So anyone out there in blog-ville who has a secret but really deep down they want others to know, then tell me and I will get the word out for you!